Lights, Ornaments, Action!  

Posted by Stephen Lowe

Oh Christmas tree, oh Christmas tree, of all the trees I loath thee

Oh Christmas tree, oh Christmas tree, of all the trees I loath thee

Each year you bring to me a sight, of gooey sap and needle blight

Oh Christmas tree, oh Christmas tree, of all the trees I loath thee

I'm not a scrooge, I just a fan of the sapless permanent needle Christmas tree, known to the uneducated as the fake or artificial tree.  I say uneducated because anyone with Christmas tree handling experience knows that the sapless permanent needle Christmas tree is far superior in every way to a "real" or "live" tree.  Some may argue that a "real" tree looks better than the SPNC tree but with  the advancements in plastics, composite materials and the inclusion of LED lights, that is no longer true.  Until we figure out how to grow a tree with included lights, no sap and needles that don't fall off, I will continue to be a fan of the SPNC tree.  Unfortunately, Stephanie is a fan of the "real" tree so I will happily become covered in sap and make myself dizzy wrapping and unwrapping lights on a tree that will die in a week and leave a trail of dead needles through the house.

So, what kind of tree are you rockin?

beautyBeautiful SPNC Tree charlie brown "Real" Tree


Stephen, this is hysterical!!!

In a perfect, sinless world where I do not water said tree, or have to constantly vacuum up the needles, or have to go out and purchase it every year, or put the lights on myself, I am a fan of the real tree.

In a fallen, sinful world in which we have 4 small children, we own a PSPNC tree. The "P" is for "pre-lit" (for the layperson and novice). Although, they aren't completely fool-proof either.

Yeah, we got that bad boy, after #2 was born. I'm surprised Stephanie hasn't sold her soul yet. :)

Ahh, I have never known the "joy" of a "real" tree...only heard about it. BIG FAN of SPNC trees (and ours is PSPNC tree, like Angela's). Though I do not enjoy the "fluffing" of the branches every year, I do enjoy that all we have to do is drag it out of its storage space and put it up. And for so much less $$ than buying a new one each winter! Especially since we got our latest super cheap last year. I'm still working on Jamie for the "let's cut a hole in the floor and install hydraulics to raise and lower the fluffed/decorated PSPNC tree!" I have it all worked out, just have to get him on board...

What Stephen failed to mention is that we do have a "fake" tree. I actually put it up last night and it is sitting in our office for all the people on the outside to see. It is what I call my "pretty tree". Complete with white lights and matching ornaments.

But yes I will still make him carry in a "real" tree. I love the smell of real trees and it just doesn't seem like Christmas without one. The real tree will sport mismatched and handmade ornaments (including ones Stephen & I made as kids) and will have colored lights which aren't my favorite but Stephen & Ethan love them. So in the end don't we all win! :)

That remake of O Christmas Tree is friggin funny!

I agree with Julie about the fluffing of the "fake" tree. To me it's just as wretched as the sap and needles from a live tree. I normally end up with microscopic pieces of fiberglass embedded in my hands and arms which cause pain for at least as long as sap makes me stick to everything. Maybe it's not fiberglass, but that's what it feels like.

Anyway, we went to live trees 3 years ago and I haven't looked back. The smell of "Christmas Wreath" candles does not compare to the smell of a "real" tree. ahhhhh...

I was pushing for a fake this year since we'll only enjoy our tree for 2 weeks. But I lost. Cooper wanted a real one. We buy our trees at Cooper's Tree Farm. He thinks he owns the place.

We had only one real tree when I grew up. My parents were too cheap to buy a tree stand so my dad used an old mop bucket and filled it up with cement (I think we chopped the tree down from a neighbor's yard when they weren't looking). It dried crooked and we had to string it up by ropes attached to the doorknobs down the hall to get the thing to stand up. Not to mention that it never got watered and died instantly! Now THAT is a great Christmas memory. I'm crying laughing about it right now!


Michelle wins the funniest Christmas tree story award. I really want to see a picture of that tree, guidewires and all. That is funny!

Give me the real tree.

About Me

My name is Stephen Lowe. I'm a Christ follower, Husband, Father, Technologophile and Metalhead. This is where I dump my observations and opinions on whatever strikes me as noteworthy. Enjoy, discuss, disagree, I'm cool with whatever.

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